


Lived and died for you

by theArcane



Series: Merthur Oneshots [3]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Canon, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Arthur Knows About Merlin's Magic (Merlin), Arthurian, Canon Divergence - Episode: s05e13 The Diamond of the Day, Canon Era, Canon Rewrite, Canonical Character Death, Character Death, Death, Episode Fix-it, Episode Related, Episode: s05e13 The Diamond of the Day, Evil Morgana (Merlin), Holding Hands, Love Confessions, M/M, Merlin's Magic Revealed (Merlin), Minor Merlin/Morgana (Merlin), POV Merlin (Merlin), POV Third Person, Protective Merlin, Sad, Sad Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-01
Updated: 2020-10-01
Packaged: 2021-03-07 23:49:01
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,486
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26756068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theArcane/pseuds/theArcane
Summary: AU where Morgana manages to stab Merlin as she's dying and Merlin is not immortal.OrMerlin and Arthur hold each other in their last moments.
Relationships: Merlin & Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Series: Merthur Oneshots [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1991122
Comments: 12
Kudos: 127





	Lived and died for you

Merlin looked into her eyes, one purple, one yellow. He always thought there was something so enticing about them, before they got filled with evil.

"I blame myself for what you've become."

"I am a High Priestess. No mortal blade can kill me."

It took one moment for Merlin to make his decision and he drove the sword right through her.

"This is no mortal blade. Like yours, it was forged in a dragon's breath."

She gasped in pain and shock.

"Merlin." Her eyes were pleading. "Hold me. Closer." He tightened his grip on her waist, determined to grant her this last wish.

"Y- you should.." Every word looked like it took a toll on her. Looking at her dying state, Merlin was almost regretting his decision.

"Stop speaking." He told her softly and ran a hand through his hair.

"Listen to me." She wrapped her arms around his neck and brought her lips to his ears. "I blame you too."

It happened in a second. Morgana's softness had led him to lower his guard and before he could realize, she had wrenched the sword out of his hand. He pushed her off himself with all the strength he could muster, too shocked to use magic but it was too late. The blade had pierced the side of his stomach. 

"Merlin!" He could hear Arthur's voice from a distance, but he could only see Morgana's eyes at the time. There was no remorse in them, only evil. _Why had he ever thought them beautiful?_

They both fell to the ground, Morgana lifelessly. The blade had pierced her heart and she hadn't suffered for long. Unlike Arthur and now _him._

" _Merlin.._ " He saw Arthur crawling towards him.

"No.. Arthur stay where you are." He had never felt pain like this before. Not even when Morgana had tortured him. Seeing Arthur dying while he could do nothing to save him, was worse than a thousand curses.

 _No_ , he has to save Arthur. He has to save his destiny. He put pressure on his wound and somehow managed to get up.

He stumbled towards Arthur, who was still trying to crawl. Every step seemed like a thousand bricks weighing him down. But he had to reach Arthur.

"Merlin-" Arthur said once Merlin fell on his knees beside him and helped him sit up.

"I killed your sister."

"You did a poor job at it." Arthur said, glancing down at Merlin's wound.

Merlin chuckled. "I'll take that as a thank you."

"Let me see."

"We don't have time for this Arthur."

"Merlin. Let me see." Arthur said in a firm tone.

"Always the boss." Merlin murmured as he lifted up his shirt.

"It's not that bad." Arthur said, once he had finished looking. "She didn't manage to stab you at a good angle. I don't think any internal organs are damaged."

"Okay we can get going now." He tried to lift up Arthur but he was too heavy. "We have to take this armour off." His armour may have saved him from an instant death but it was still very heavy.  
Fortunately, instead of arguing, Arthur agreed.

They both struggled with the armour, even though Merlin had a lot of practice with it. They eventually managed to get it off, leaving Arthur in his shirt. He _looked_ a lot lighter.

"Good. Let's go." He put Arthur's one hand around his shoulder and tried to lift him up. Still heavy. "I told you to not eat that much."

"Merlin."

Merlin ignored him and tried to lift them up again.

"Merlin, _please_."

Merlin shook his head. They both knew what he was going to say. "No." He said firmly.

Arthur removed arms from Merlin's shoulder and held his face. "I will only hinder us both. You can still save yourself. Leave me."

"This is barely a scratch. It will heal. We have to get you to the lake."

"It's too far Merlin. Without the horses."

"We will make it." Merlin said stubbornly.

"Listen to me. Leave me to die by my sister's side. Maybe we will be able to make it to the other side together."

"You and her are not going to the same side."

Arthur smiled. He caressed Merlin's face gently. "You have served me well, better than any soldier or any knight. Now obey my one last wish."

"When have I ever obeyed you?"

Arthur looked away and dropped his hand from Merlin's face. "I cannot let you die on my accord."

"I have _lived_ on your accord. What is death in comparison to that?"

"What did I ever do to deserve you?"

"Nothing. Other than being the biggest prat in Camelot."

Arthur laughed and then clutched his wound in pain. Merlin realized this would be the last time he would see Arthur Pendragon laughing. He also knew that there will be no life worth living without that laugh.

"Hold me." Arthur said when he saw how Merlin was looking at him. He leaned back, his back against his chest. Merlin wrapped his arms around his waist, feeling his taut stomach underneath his thin shirt. _How many times had he imagined holding his King like this? How many times had he dreamed of running his hands up and down this chest, this stomach and through what lay below the stomach._

Arthur snuggled back to him. He also seemed to want to close any distance between them.

"Promise me. Promise me that you will go to the lake and heal yourself. And live a long life, being yourself, without hiding anything."

Merlin wondered if Kilgarrah would listen to his summons, old as he was. He opened his mouth to shout his name but realized he had no energy left. Not even to save Arthur. His wound may not be fatal, but the dragon blade was draining him fast. _A Pendragon and the Dragonlord dying by the dragon's breath- what an irony!_

"I promise." Lying to Arthur came so easy to him, even when he had bared all his secrets to him. _Every secret but one._ "I have to tell you something. Something I have never said before."

"Hm?" Arthur looked like he was going to sleep again, _or worse.._

"You were always more than a friend to me. More than a brother. More than my destiny."

"I know, _Mer_ lin." Arthur said softly. "I've always seen it in your eyes." He wrapped his fingers around his servant's arm.

 _Your eyes.. Have we met before?_ Merlin remembered the words from a thousand years ago.

"Why didn't you say something?" He ran his hand up and down Arthur's torso slowly. "Why did you kept me around?"

"Because I was a coward bigger than you." He sighed. "I could read _your_ eyes, but not my own mind. I could never admit to myself that my feelings mirrored yours."

A feeling of happiness washed over Merlin. All those years of pining and thinking himself a deviant, he never realized that Arthur had lived him as much as he loved him. His eyes were filled with tears- of bliss or sorrow or pain, he did not know.

"I am sorry I couldn't save you." He sobbed.

"I am sorry," Arthur winced. "That I let you fight your battles alone all these years. I can never repay you." He linked his fingers with Merlin's tightly.

Merlin fell silent. Finally, he said, "This is the longest we've ever gone without bashing each other."

"If only we knew how to love each other properly, right?" He patted his hand.

"I would give a thousand perfect loves for yours imperfect one."

"How can you conjure up poetry when you are in so much pain? I can barely string thoughts together."

"I am supposed to be an expert in poetry, remember?"

Arthur smiled weakly. His lips were chapped and his skin pale white. "Let me go now. I will not delay you further."

Merlin grunted, in pain and frustration. He could feel the blood seeping out his side. "You do know that it was a fake promise, right?"

"Arthur?"

 _Silence_.

"Arthur?"

 _Silence_.

"Arthur." Merlin choked on his tears. He laid Arthur down on the ground and touched their foreheads together. His eyes were shut. His breathing became slower by the second.

"You sleep well now." Merlin whispered. "I will follow soon. You sleep well."

Merlin knew he could still get up and reach the Lake. He could go back to Camelot to help Gwen rule and make the place a safe haven for the magical folks. He could do this and that. A thousand things. But for now, he just wanted to hold the man he loved in his arms. He just wanted to sleep

He collapsed on top of his him, all his pain and worries gone now. He had never known such peace. And then the King and his servant slept together, knowing nothing could seperate them now.

**Author's Note:**

> For some reason, Arthur's armour in the last episode really annoyed me. They could've reached the Lake a lot faster if only they'd gotten rid of it.. 
> 
> Anyways, please leave kudos or comments if you liked it!! Xoxo


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